Ralph Reed aka Ralph PTL (Pass the Loot) Reed

Denny "The Hand" Hastert

Jack Abramoff - 'Little Indian' 'Indian Giver'
Bob Ney - 'Buckeye Browneye'
Michael Scanlon - "troglodyte" or "monkey"

Just a few I thought up.
BTW First time posting. (YAY!!!)

-DIT
"This is where the party ends
I can't stand here listening to you,
And your racist friends." -TMBG

Jackemoff Abramoff

I know he's not on the list ..but Rove could be the "Turdman of Alcatraz"

John Doolittle - 'Johnny Doorag'

Ralph purtylips Reed

Ralph "Malph" Reed

Bob "Onmynob" Ney

Conrad "Rug" Burns

When DeLay is sent to prison, I guarantee his seat will be open. Wide open.

"Don't Ralph, Just Swallow" Reed

Ralph Holyhole Reed

Not on the list but

Tommy "Goo-Goo Eyes" Delay

Ralph Kneedpads Reed

Michael Scanlon = Mikey Scan-loins

Actually, I'm a Canadian. But I've watched some of those salad-toss'n detail US prison documentaries.

Chris Rock has it right. I think the point is, if the Religious Right believes in harder, meaner, longer & industrialized prisons... perhaps they should be sent to the SuperMax, not a Club prison.

Anyway: I don't know if they'd hurt in an executive prison. Let them be a warning to their Own.

http://www.theocracywatch.org/ralph_reed.jpg

Tom "Just Delay There and take it"

Jack Abramoff = Abraham Jack Off

John Doolittle = John Doolittle

I really can't improve on it.

Ralph bendover and pray Reed

Bob pick-up-the-soap-an' Ney

Jack Abramoff -- Jack Me Off
Bob Ney -- Bubbles
Michael Scanlon -- Skanklon
Conrad Burns -- Flamer
Ralph Reed -- Mittens
John Doolittle -- The Diddler

pick any one:

just call 'em the "GreasyPalms" Gang

BlueBerry Pick'n is ThisCanadian.com
"Silent Freedom is Freedom Silenced"

Ralph Reed - Little Boy Blew

jack abramoff --- jack "abra-kadabra" 'm off

dennis "house-dirt" hastert

tom delay --- "bugs", "bugsy", "bugger", or
more likey "bugee"

How about "Jack Pay 'em off," or "Just Pay'em off."

Conrad Burns = Conman Burned

Ralph Reed aka Ineedabigone

Ralph Reed aka Deep Betty

Ralph Reed aka Chappedlips

Jack Abramoff - Jack Rubhimoff

Bob Ney - Bob Yay!

Michael Scanlon - Michael Mansloin

Conrad Burns - Manrod Burns

Ralph "Spank-Me-Wit-Dat" Reed

John Doolittle - John Poolittle

NAME THAT TUNE--

"Chuckles" DeLay

"Mo'Money" Abramoff

"Skanky" Scanlon

"JackOff" or Jack "JackOff" or Jack "JackOff" Abramoff= Jack Abramoff

"Muffy" or "Muff" Abramoff or Jack "Muff(y)" A... or Abramoff

jack abramoff --- jack "abra-kadabra" 'm off

dennis "house-dirt" hastert

tom delay --- "bugs", "bugsy", "bugger", or
more likey "bugee"

I have one guys "NayTom hole wide open"

michael "scandalin'" scanlon

ralph "lilly whites" reed ,
ralph "read this" reed

conrad "this" burns

i want my prizes right away!!

Prison bitch name suggestions:

Hastert- "Fatsert"
Abramoff -jackmeoff
Burns- Burn-me
Reid- "reamed"
Ney- "She nay nay"
Doolittle- "Do lickle"
Scanlon- Scan long"

Happy New Year- Hope they all drop the soap many times!!

Jack Abramoff will be Abe Jackoff...

Tom Delay is not on the list, however, I do have a nick name for him. The Randi Rhodes show calls him Hot Tub Tom. Once Tom gets convicted & becomes a prison Bitch, he'll be called Hot Butt Tom

Mike skin flute Scanlon

Tom De Losser

God is Watching!

A Ralph Reed Quote:

"I want to be invisible. I do guerrilla warfare. I paint my face and travel at night."

It is good that Ralph "fancy woman" Reed is good with make-up. He will need to look pretty in the big house.

Jack Abramoff -- `Jack Me' Abramoff

Bob Ney -- `He's Just a Girl Who Can't Say' Ney

Michael Scanlon -- Micheal `Tan lines'

Conrad Burns -- Excellent, Smithers

Ralph Reed -- `Donna' Reed

John Doolittle --Dr. Dolittle

!

Jack "off" Abramoff

Bob "whiney and" Ney

Michael "mikey likes it" Scanlon

Conrad "Rug" Burns

Ralph "kneepads" Reed

John "dewey or doo little" Doolittle
Denny "lovehandles" Hastert
Tom "the hammer" delay
Scooter "scooter" libby
Karl "Hershey Highway" Rove
Dick "the Dick" Cheney
Georgie Porgey "lick my" Bush
Duke "Dukester" Cunningham
Grover "the garbageman"Norquist
Richard "little dickey" Pombo
Sen. John "cornhole" Cornyn
J.D. "just DoMe" Hayworth
Rep. Eric I."browneye" Cantor
Neil "kneepads" Volz
Ed "fuckem" Buckham
Senator David "you can't just eat one" Vitter
Melissa "messy" Hart
Susan "it's a man baby" Hirschmann

Tom Delay: the 'Bug Man' but soon to be the 'Buggered Man'

Tom Delay: Lady Delay or Lay Lay Delay (apologies to Bob Dylan)

Jack Abramoff: Trixie

Bob Ney: Oy Ney!

Michael Scanlon: "Man in the hole" Scanlon

Conrad Burns: Analriffic!

Ralph Reed: Seed Feeder Reed, or just "Hey cunt"

John Doolittle: John "Do Me a Little"

Jack Abramoff: Jackhimoff

Tom "SWEET DEET" Delay

"Ballin' the Jack Abramoff"

Denny's "Rooty Tooty Fresh & Fruity" Hastert

You said Jack Abramoff would probably be the one smuggling goods in for the other prisoners, so I was thinking something along the lines of "Jack Squat-and-Cough Abramoff". Haha, what do you think?!

Ralph "the Butt-Holy Surfer" Reed

Conrad "Feel The Burn" Burns

Jack Abramoff; "Wacko-Jacko"

Bob Ney; A-Ney

Michael Scanlon; "Scamlon" or Scammin'Scanlon

Conrad Burns; "Conman Burned"

Ralph Reed; Buttholyman or The Butt-Holy Surfer

Karl Rove; Lardass

George W. Bush; "Hard-work"

Scooter Libby; "Poop-Scoot"

Dick Cheney; "Big-Time Loser"

John "Talk to the Animals" Doolittle
or
Johnny Hotcakes

Bob "The Builder" Ney
or
Bob "Wantcha be my Neighbor"

Ralph Reed me my Rights

Conrad "Some like it Hot" Burns

Michael "The Screamer" Scanlin

Jack Abramoff "Public Enema Number 2"

On Top Tom

TAKE IT ALL TOM

RIMJOB REED

TABOO TOM

RALPH THE RUMP

"Lay Me Down Delay"

Haven't focused yet on the individuals but I much prefer calling these pigs the Abramoffia (rather than referring to the holiday as "Abramoffukah").

DEEP-THROAT DELAY !

.

.

pardon my boldness. how about adding to the contest: best spin on each story linking abe's empire to each fraudulent incident?

Michael Scanlon The prostate pinata

Conrad Burns The Montana Moaner

John Doolittle
Goo spittle Doolittle Spawnin John Doolittle

Bob Ney

Mobbed Prey
Bobbin Bob
Throbbin Bob
Buffet Bob
Oft Boffed Bobby Ney
Squeeze play Ney
Bobby Ney, Tier 3's bidet
Gobblin Bob Ney

Ralph Reed
Chief Shitting Full

Jack Abramoff

Beefed Abramoff

Beef Abramboffed

Packed, slammed, he coughs

Pipe rack Jack

lamb chop abramoff blowback jack

Poke-a-haunchess

oops. pretty funny stuff norm... sorry
very clever people here.
ta

I really like Bob Ney-hole. That's a great one.

Jack Abramoff - Jackoff, Jerkoff, Jacking off Congress

Conrad Burns - Fiery Asshole

Tom DeLay'd Fucking You Over

John Doolittle - John Doolittle "In Congress other than Whore Himself Out" (or variations)

ralph reed- free abortion provider

dennis hastert- low income housing bond developer

randall terry- thinks overpopulation and forcing your view on others is american. have the catholic church house all the homeless for free if they love the people so much .

please do a google search on javelle birth control a
norplant replacement to be released by FDA in
2006

The White House rarely upbraids conservative radio
talk show hosts. But the administration blasted former
education secretary, drug czar, and virtue maven
William Bennett when he said, "if you wanted to
reduce crime, you could - if that were your sole
purpose - you could abort every black baby in this
country, and your crime rate would go down."

He added that this would be "impossible,
ridiculous and morally reprehensible." Nevertheless,
one detected the slight whiff of...genocide, or at
least eugenics.

But these same liberal commentators should ponder the
fact that this set of statistics is compatible with
pro-abortion arguments. When abortion-rights
proponents argue that every baby should be a wanted
baby, that every baby should be born into a family
that can afford to raise it, they are saying that it
would be good, for example, if abortion rates were
higher among the poor - who are disproportionately
black - than among the middle class or the wealthy.

This, they have argued for decades, would have
good social effects. In that case they should readily
embrace the argument of the mathematician Steven
Levitt - whose views Bennett was discussing - that
increased abortion rates correlate with reduced crime.
Such a correlation would richly confirm a tradition of
pro-choice arguments.

Throughout its history, feminist advocacy of birth
control and abortion has had a eugenic sub-text. This
was certainly true of birth control pioneer Margaret
Sanger, for example, who at times even advocated
compulsory sterilization for women whose genetics or
reproductive practices she found objectionable.

People on the left and the right have suggested
mandatory contraceptive patches and the like for
teenage mothers, who are, again, disproportionately
black.

So the American right also has its eugenicists and
its advocates of social transformation through control
of reproduction. William Bennett's wife Elayne is the
founder of the Best Friends Foundation, which targets
inner-city (largely black) children for "abstinence
education." The largest efforts have been in the
overwhelmingly black DC public school system.

One might describe this program as an attempt to
persuade black people not to reproduce.

It would be ironic for the American right if
mandatory sentencing laws, community policing, the war
on drugs, and extremely high incarceration rates were
irrelevant to crime rates, which instead responded to
abortion on demand and specifically to government
funding for abortions among the poor.

Of course, imprisonment itself is a de facto
eugenics program, and if black women have three times
the abortion rate of white women, black men have
perhaps six times the incarceration rate of white men.
According to Human Rights Watch in a study published
in 2002, 378 out of 100,000 white Americans were
incarcerated, and 2489 out of 100,000 blacks.
Incarceration, one would expect, limits reproductive
opportunities.

Conservatives might simply take this confirm
Bennett's monstrous moment. Incarceration rates
correspond to crime rates. Reduce the number of black
people: reduce the crime rate. In any case, the actual
law enforcement practices endorsed by conservatives -
which often have included racial profiling for various
purposes - can be expected to have eugenic effects.

Some of my choices Tom "The Hammered" DeLay or Tom "Easy" DeLay, Conrad "Rug" Burns, Ralph "Bending" Reed,

When does this contest end?
jane

Why not use The name abramoff gives himself as "super Zionist.

The other scandal that the mainstream press is not reporting on in any detail is Abramoffs funding of terrorist settler groups in the west bank by channeling funds from his phony Charities which he set up. If this were an Arab funding hamas or other groups this would be front page news for months on end. And they would have been disappeared and taken to some torture chamber. The whole story can be heard at the following website. The program was broadcast on Wednesday, January 4th

http://www.kpfa.org/archives/index.php?show=9

Wednesday, January 4th

Ralph "Mouth" Reed, fellatio kiosk for Cell Block D

Conrad "Burning Sensation"

"Knob Gob" Bob Ney

Jack "The Crack" Abramoff

Mikey "Likes It" Scanlon

Johnny "Mop" Doolittle

Prison "tag" for Abramoff:

Little Miss Pioneer

This is a reference to an episode of "Car 54 Where Are You?". If anyone remembers seeing this hilarious episode they will understand. I can't think of anything else when I hear the word pioneer.

"Kneel and Bob" Ney

Neylicious Bob

Mount Doolittle

Jack "Honey Bun-Bun" Abramoff

Two-pack Jack

asshole De lay on the menu today
asshole Burns
Asshole Scan my Man Scanlon
Asshole Do Little fome on your knees Dolittle
Sway back Ney
Ralph Glory Hole Reed
Jack "babyshit" Abrhamoff is that some nasty assed santorum babyshit driping on his brogans

Pony Boy Ney

and

Felons A B C D & E

Jack: Jackoff

Bob Ney: Bubba's little Nell

Michael Scanlon: Get yer Manon

Conrad Burns: too much to sit down.

Ralph Reed: Bubbas little weed

John Doolittle: Cause it hurts so much

"Knob-Job" Bob Ney (some theft on that
name from Pandemia)

Jack Abramoff - Jack in the Box

Ralph Reed - Ralph Bleed

Bob Ney - Roll-in-the-Hay Ney

Michael Scanlon - Michael ScamCon

Conrad Burns - Con Rug Burns

John Doolittle - John Poo Diddle

jack abramoff - jack abracadabramoff

conrad burns - comrade burns'n tush

john doolittle - johnny johnny johnny johnny whoops johnny whoops johnny johnny johnny johnny doolittle

michael scanlon - michael scribble on the wall scanlon

ralph reed - ralph read'n more

bob ney - barbed wire billy ney

under closer inspection i noticed that jack abracadabramoff was already submitted... - so - i rescind my submission and continue a new...

jack abramoff - jackie robbinsom'indians't'fold'n'som'undies abramoff

Tome Delay = "The Exterminated"

after their first shower:
abramoff= pencil dick

Michael " 'Gimme Five' to Ten" Scanlon

Since Abramoff fancies himself to be a gangster, how about "Sloppy Gotti"

Kneel and Bob Ney

Ralph Reed will likely never have felt so alive, once he's "forced" into homosexual activity.

For that reason they call him "Inside Job" Reed, since nobody on the inside puts more into their jobs.

Jackies-ass Abramoff
G-Bob No "Ney-et" (Russian for "No")
Michelle Scanlon
Conrad's **s-hole Burns
Ralph "Oh my Lord, You're bigger than Texas" Reed
John Doin'-it-too-little

Hmmm, let me think...

Jack Abramoff: Abe Jack-em-off

Bob Ney: Bob And-Neigh-Louder-Now

Michael Scanlon: Micheal Scans-low

Conrad Burns: Got Bad Burns

Ralph Reed: Ralph Seed

John Doolittle: John Poodiddle

Hee hee hee...

conrad burns: manhole
ralp reed: the money shot
jack abramhoff: big daddy
bob ney: little bitch

WHEN DO YOU ANNOUNCE WINNERS??

If I win , I want a ticket to Uzbekhistan,to
try that boiled-in-oil adventure. It would have
to be olive oil,though,I have my standards.

Maybe a Vegan Casino,serving wheat-grass juice,
instead of fire-water? workin on that one..
Green Tea?

DID I WIN YET??

michael scanlon: the squealer.

Jack Abramoff: Jackov

Bob Ney: Bobby-Boy, or BB, for short...

Michael Scanlon: Mikie the Dandelion

Conrad Burns: Comrade Sweet Buns

Ralph Reed: Ralphie

John Doolittle: Johnny B. Good

John DooLittle = John face down and do very lttle
Conrad Burns = Conrad screaming for more floor burns

I like Jack A'moff.
Hopefully they will give em all the "OZ" treatment.

Contact the bastard and give him hell:

Washington D.C. Office
2438 Rayburn House Office Bldg.
Washington, D.C. 20515
P: 202.225.6265
F: 202.225.3394
E-mail: bobneymail.house.gov

I left a message for him last week, reminding him not to drop the soap when he goes away.

I just called Bob Ney's office again.

I asked if there was any truth
to the "rumors on the internets,"
that Ney is resigning.

The staffer had to put me on hold and find out.

Which to me, means the staffer might believe it is happening. If enough people believe it, denials may be in order. With any luck, he will now release a statement denying he will resign, causing the press to wonder why he'd deny it, riling the whole thing up another notch.

Please call and ask if there is truth to the rumor.

/Karl Rove wannabe

How about Bob "donkey punch" Ney. A little bit offensive, a little puny, I like it.

Jack Abramoff = Fudge Sucker
Bob Ney = Heywood Djeblomi
Michael Scanlon = Deep Throat
Conrad Burns = Famous Anus
Ralph Reed = Skin Flautis
John Doolittle = Shit Eater

Jack Abramoff = Gotti's Boy
Bob Ney = Bruce
Michael Scanlon = Whore
Conrad Burns = The Undertaker
Ralph Reed = Boy Bitch
John Doolittle = Commie Girl

Jack Abramoff - Jack the Ripoff

Ralph Reed Skim Shady

What do you think Bush has been doing all this time? He must know something.

"Come'ere sweety, ooh, oh, ahhh! What the hell? Karl! I told you not to eat first! Well... that's a real turd blossom, isn't it? "

I think W should win this contest. (Or he should be appointed as the winner.)

Doolittle: Doome.

I knew having Alito's fuckin' family present was going to be a factor. Wolfman Blitzer is going to lead off his show in a few minutes with Alito's hag leaving the hearing in tears because of suggestions of "racism."

I think I'm going to puke.

Jack Abramoff~I'm gonna tug that stupid fedora offa your skanky ass head and stick my dick in your mouth beyatch

Bob Ney~C'mere beyatch

Michael Scanlon~Toss my salad beyatch

Conrad Burns~If my dick falls off I'll kill you beyatch

Ralph Reed~Give me your butts and go pretty yourself up beyatch (don't forget that red lipstick that makes my dick look so good)

John Doolittle~Flip over, I'm almost finished beyatch

Note to Dutch Masters;
There's a lot of crybabies on the Right,
nowadays.
Go ahead and puke, ya gotta get the
poison out-

CONTEST-
How about Ca-Ca(Duke) Cunningham?

HEY , DID I WIN YET?

Jack Abramoff -- Jack "Poke-a-hontas" Abramoff

Bob Ney -- Bob "Kneepad" Ney

Michael Scanlon -- Micheal "Crystal" Scanlon

Conrad Burns -- Conrad "Bertha" Burns

Ralph Reed -- Ralph "Property of Squid" Reed

John Doolittle --John "SweetCheeks" Doolittle

Sam and Josh

About my casino-

Would either of you be interested in living my backyard and running my casino for me?

Thanks!
(As an insentive-Free food on Tuesdays-thats when I get to bring food home from work)

For Conrad Burns I think a good bitch name would be Cum-ram My-Buns

If there's a prize for being #100, then
I WON.........I'll take my prize in $$$

ON THE NAME-CALLING CONTEST--

DID I WIN YET!??

I'm still looking forward to that trip to Uzbekhistan, to be boiled-in -(olive)oil
DON'T RENEGE ON YOUR PROMISES,ANNOUNCE THE WINNERS

Jack Abramoff- "Toe Tag"

Bob Ney- "The Fondled"

Tom Delay- "Butt Gutter"

Bill Frist-Two Fist :)

Karl (the kissing-sissy) Rove......he's not
100% untouchable....

P.S.---SBXL--Broncos 31,Seahawks 19
ya heard it here foist 1-21-06

Jack Abramoff- Jack Mioffski

Jack Abramoff = Jack 'em Off

Bob Ney = Sha Ney Ney

Michael Scanlon = Scanlous Skank

Conrad Burns = Cum Catcher

Ralph Reed = Reed My Hips Pussy Lips

Tom Delay = Sugarland Sugar Baby

Karl Rove = Cock Hole Rove

John Doolittle = Do a Little More

'Hi-'Jack Abramoff

Bob 'na-na-na-na, na-na-na-na, Ney-Ney-Ney GOOODBYE!'

Michael 'scam-man' Scanlon

'Con' Burns

Ralph 'Rimjob' Reed

John 'can Doolittle to avoid tossing Julios' salad for the next two-to-five'

Tom 'Delay'd justice'

Karl 'Bush's LameBrain' Rove

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I guess that those prison bitches are gonna need
sex toys,hence the entrepeneur ....or, are they
gonna be sex toys ?

I wonder what Judith Miller's prison name was?

HEY ! DID I WIN YET?

Jack Abramoff -- Jack "The Suck-Off" Man

Bob Ney -- Rob "Velvet Mouth" Ney

Michael Scanlon -- Mikey "Likes It" in the Ass

Conrad Burns -- Connie "Burned Knees" Burns

Ralph Reed -- Ralphie "Choir Boy Toy" Reed

John Doolittle -- John "Do Me Right" Doolittle

I sincerely hope that Reed is fucked politically. His race for Lt. Gov is a stepping stone to something scarier.

jailed rePUSSicans

Michael Scanlon - "Scamlon"

Conrad Burns - Conrad "Boo Boo" Burns

John Doolittle- "Eliza" !!!!

Jack Abramoff -- In prison Abramoff will say: "I'll- Jack-Abram-Off..." So I don't get beat like the little bitch I am

Bob Ney -- Goat Boy (Ney is the sound Goats make when they get sodomized... at least thats what Ney's cell mate will say)

Conrad Burns -- Conradical (It's gonna be radical to watch Conrad and the whole republican party go down in flames)

Thats all I got

WANTED BY THE WAR-CRIMES COURT IN EUROPE :

"Rumpie" Rumsfeld

"Head-man" Cheney

"Ass-candy" Rice

Ralph "Screamin' Jeezus" Reed
Jack "Rocky, Bubba, Mondo, Chino, Earl, Butch, Earnie, Jorge, George, Dick, Tom, Bill And" Abramoff

Conrad "When I pee, my weiner" Burns

Bob "Squeal like a pig, then" Ney

John "Grab your ankles, then" Doolittle

Michael "SkankLoins" Scanlon

(A nod to KevinK and JBreslin, who almost got it right.)

Jack Abramoff: Prances with Wolves

Bob Ney: Jezebelle

Michael Scanlon: Sir Hugsalot

Conrad Burns: Cornhole Burns

Ralph Reed: Ralph Mouth

John Doolittle: John Duvet